My Dad
“I’m just a kid!” he’d often say, as we playfully went about our day. My dad knew and lived out the value of play, coupled with an attitude of optimism, in everything he did. Even Alzheimer’s didn’t take away his “look for the good” view on life. Content with what he had and thankful to God for everything, dad would often repeat “I’m such a lucky man!”. He felt blessed and it overflowed to others in his generosity. Whatever we might suggest to him, whether help with a project, a ride for one of the kids, an idea for an adventure together, or wanting a serious conversation on one of life’s big questions… he was always willing and ready to be there for us. I am blessed with so, so many memories and lessons learned from both his years before and during Alzheimer’s. My dad passed away on February 2, 2021, after cheerfully and courageously living with Alzheimer’s.
Tony’s Dad
Five weeks later, on March 9, 2021, Tony’s dad passed away after years of congestive heart failure. Like my dad, Ed was also a man who loved God and prioritized his family. We appreciated his steadfast prayers for all of us and his support for our sometimes unconventional choices such as our sailing adventures. Ed was an artist and we are blessed with his last piece of artwork riding on the bow of our boat. During his last years, Ed’s brain was sharp, but his heart became weaker and weaker. Enjoying visitors, reading books, doing jigsaw puzzles, and playing board games, he never let his circumstances damper his good humor and outlook on life. He was content and ready to die; In his own words, “It has been a great life, I have no regrets, and I look forward to meeting my God”.
First Father’s Day Without Dad
So here we are: the first Father’s Day after the passing of both of our dads.
Thankful for such exemplary fathers in our lives, yet missing them.
Although we’re learning to “ride the waves” of emotions in grieving, we knew this Father’s day might bring a big wave.
We are thankful for the years of our dad’s fatherly love and positive influence on our lives. We feel blessed to have such a deep reserve of fond memories, yet, sad we can’t make any new memories with our dads. Somehow, we’ll find a way to allow the aches of missing them and the sweet memories of the wonderful times we shared with them to mix together.
Brainstorming on how to navigate the day, we settled on a plan to enjoy some of the activities that reflected our dad’s interests and personalities. It was easy to come up with plenty of ideas because both dads basically enjoyed life, whatever their circumstances.
Enjoy Each Day
So, we’ll enjoy this day, whatever we do!
I’m guessing it might include some time at the beach (both loved the water), eating ice cream (my dad) and chocolates (Ed), a game of ping-pong (my dad), and a round of Quirkle (Ed).
A wonderful post. Boy, what a year!
Sounds like you have the right attitude, enjoy the fond memories!
Great memories, thanks for sharing!!
Julie, Somehow this post escaped me until today. You and Tony were so incredibly blessed! I’m very grateful for my dad, too. He and yours sure were a special pair!
You’re absolutely right about having such outstanding dads in our lives, and moms too! And our dad’s friendship over the years, yes, they were quite the pair!